Gareth Southgate: Trading Tactics for Textiles? Gareth Southgate, England’s tactically astute yet splendid manager, might just swap his tactical board for a tailoring tape. With Euro 2024 on the horizon, rumors buzz that Southgate’s next formation might be on the fashion runway. From Defence to Design: The Football World Reacts Harry Maguire, England’s defender who’s […]
Klopp Sacked after 4-0 drubbing
Liverpool chairman Tom Werner has wasted no time ousting iconic manager Jurgen Klopp. This comes after Liverpool succumbed to a 4-0 hammering to arch rivals Manchester United in a preseason friendly in Bangkok. Me love you long time but… “I don’t give a ladyboy’s ass if it is preseason!”, Tom Werner told the African Football […]
10 things I hate about you
Ole Gunnar Solskjaer has broken his silence after the 5-0 thrashing of his Manchester United to team. The Manchester United manager has surprisingly lashed out at the Liverpool hattrick hero Mohammed Salah. 10 things “Ok not easy to admit this but I have been mourning a lot these past few days in my treble underwear..”, […]
Manchester United in talks with Rugby Lock Eben Etzebeth
Ole Gunnar Solskjaer has slammed the new “rough” interpretation of Premier League rules. This comes after a contentious 1-1 draw against Southampton. The Red Devils feel Southampton’s goal should not have stood due to a rough body-check moments before, on playmaker Bruno Fernandes. Outraged Ole “This is not rugby for fuck sakes?! Diving maybe! But […]
Kane Hints at Number 10 Shirt or No Deal
Spurs striker Harry Kane has insisted Pep Guardiola gift him the number 10 jersey or he will not sign for Manchester City. The England international has been strongly linked with a move to City this transfer window. Gentleman’s Agreement “I’ve thrown down the gauntlet for the gaffer”, Harry told the African Football Expert. “We spat […]
Locatelli Replaces Coke With Finer Things in Life
Italy have started their Uefa Euro 2021 tournament off with a bang, actually two bangs.Back to back 3 – 0 wins sees Italy sitting pretty on top of group A. In a post match interview Italian midfielder Manuel Locatelli joins the latest stars, in removing sponsorships refreshments from the interview panel. Cristiano Ronaldo angrily replaced […]
13 Reasons Why Man City Won Another Premier League – Pep Shares Insights
Manchester City Football Club have captured yet another Premier League title this season making light work of all competition in the latter half of their campaign. Things were not so peachy in the beginning of the 20-21 season though, Pep was not able to push out of 13th place for the longest time. 13 Reasons […]
Alisson Credits Heavy Metal Football and Father for Win
Goalkeeper Alisson Becker has kept Liverpool’s Champions Leagues hopes alive after a last gasp winning header against West Brom. The 2-1 win means Liverpool are in touching distance of a Champions League spot for next season. Rammstein Alisson has had to overcome a lot of depression this year due to losing his father in a […]
“Null and Void the Season, Safety First!” – Klopp
Manchester United and Liverpool had their Sunday match postponed due to a day of mass protest. Worried about safety concerns both teams agreed a postponement was in order. The protests are in the wake of the recent European Super League proposal. Liverpool manager Jurgen Klopp has taken it once step further, strongly advising the season […]
“It’s Time for me to Bale” – Kane
“It’s a very sad time for everyone involved… no one likes to be a third wheel, so we ripped off the band aid. I wish Son all the best”, Kane told the African Football Expert. Harry Kane, Tottenham Hotspurs’ top striker has called it quits with his strike partner Son Heung Min, stating he prefers […]