Football’s Coming Rome

The sun has officially set on the UEFA Euro Cup.

A gutted and heartbroken England can only watch on and see the mighty Italians lift the cup.

The Three Lions failed to win the Euro Cup on home soil against a well oiled Azzuri team. Suffering a 3-2 penalty shoot-out defeat, after a cagey 1-1 draw in full time.


“Excuse my language kindly, but we are fucking jinxed!”, a deflated Gareth Southgate told the African Football Expert.

“If we can’t win with VAR, freaking laser beams, home soil advantage and the Queen pulling strings, we will never win, we are forever fucked.”

“Please again…pardon my language. But seriously fuck this”, the England manager continued.

“I have to be honest, it is a relief too, I have passed the torch onto Rashford, Sancho and Saka.”

“My time obsessing about what ifs is done. It’s over and now I can finally resign with a peace of mind, knowing the spotlight is no longer on me. Mission accomplished.”

Say Chiesa

We tried to catch up with Italian manager Roberto Mancini between all the singing and chanting from an electrified Italian side.

“Football’s coming Rome!”, laughed Mancini jumping up and down, “It’s coming Rome, it’s coming Rome… football’s coming Rome!”

“Write this in your paper, tell Neil Diamond and Sweet Caroline that Football is coming Rome!”